Flowers are beautiful, don’t get me wrong. I love them. But when someone gives you a bouquet of flowers, just a few days later they wilt, brown, and droop. They look so miserable and then you have to throw them out. Sometimes they even start to smell bad. It makes me so sad.
“Then give a plant as a gift,” you say. But then you haven’t given me a gift, you’ve given me a job. I have to water it and find a good place to put it and worry about it if I leave for a weekend… it’s a responsibility. Please don’t give me a plant.
I understand why kings had gardens, because they were a lot of work and they are very expensive. You’d have to be a monarch to keep up with those flowers. So maybe instead of flowers, give me plane tickets. Nothing says “I care about you” more than plane tickets.
Bouquet: (Noun) An attractively arranged bunch of flowers
Wilt: (Verb) Become limp through heat, loss of water
Droop: (Verb) Cause to bend or hang downwards.
Miserable: (Noun) Unhappy or uncomfortable.
Monarch: (Noun) Head of state, especially a king, queen, or emperor.